Introducing the Perfect Mom...Well Almost

I took the twins to the dentist this morning.

I was a bit worried before going, because while B had handled his prior two visits like a champ ,J had cried each time.

Before we went , I talked with J and told her there wasn't a need to be scared because the dentist was only going to look at her teeth and that even if she did get scared mommy would be right there.

She seemed satisfied and said "Ok, Mommy, I won't cry" and off we went.

When we walked in to the dentists office B & J proceeded to charm the pants off of everyone with choruses of "Hello" and "Nice to meet you" to the staff and other patients in the waiting room.

"They're so cute" I heard from not one but two parents in the waiting room. Silently I hoped that they'd stay "cute". Because I knew that tearing them away from the games and toys in the waiting room could possibly be an all out war.

Moments later the hygienist called us. So I braced myself and said "C'mon guys, its our turn to see the dentist"

"Okay Mom," B says "Okay, Mom" J says as they followed me back to the patient rooms.

Back in the patients area, I waited for the madness to begin as I tried to keep an eye on both children in an area full of stickers, shiny tools and chairs that moved up and down like amusement park rides.
But, to my suprise, they both sat by me and watched intently as the hygienist instructed us on how to properly brush and floss.

When the dentist came, both B & J were attentive and did everything they were instructed to and even thanked him when he was done.
B even went so far as to hug the hygienist.

I was feeling pretty good about myself thinking how I must look to the staff. I mean these children are well behaved, polite, articulate and cute to boot. I am the perfect mommy...I thought patting myself on the back.

Before we left B asked if he could play the video games again for a bit. I reluctantly said yes knowing I needed to head out to work. But, hell who would it hurt. Besides he'd made me look been so good I just couldn't refuse him.

So I let him and his sister play games for about five minutes and let them know at the end of each minute how much time they had. And guess what ? It worked. At the end of five minutes,no fights, no nothing they simply took my hands and headed towards the door but not before saying "Bye, see you next time" to the staff.

I really am the perfect parent I thought as we headed to the car.

Once in the car, still on cloud nine, I looked back at them and said "You guys were so good in the dentists office you deserve a reward" So we headed off to our favorite reward store (aka Dollar Tree).

I was really feeling good about, well, about me and my stellar parenting skills as we sauntered down the aisles looking for the perfect reward.

Until I heard screams and stomping.

I turned around to see my two angels fighting. I mean physically fighting... and over ant killer no less and they were drawing a crowd.

As I quickly tried to control the melee , my shoulders slumped. My little angels had turned in to little devils in 5 minutes flat!

Fuckity, fuck , fuck....I guess thats what I get for being so full of myself in the first place.

That'll teach me to do that again!