Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Some things are better left Unworn

When contemplating whether or not to wear that claw clip I have but two words - eh eh.

I know what you're thinking.

You're thinking, who's she to criticize anyone?... Like she's all that.

Well I might tend to agree with you. I am after all just your average female. On most days I can barely get it together enough to slap on make-up before work and some days I might even fall victim to my inner frump. But having said that, let me say now that I know better then to ever wear a claw clip anywhere on my head. They served their purpose back in 1983 and I thought had been buried in a time capsule somewhere for our great grandkids to laugh hysterically at while exclaiming "What was that old bat thinking?"

But in a crazy turn of events I spotted one today. And I'll be durned if it was not perched atop the head of someone who- well poor thing just didn't have a clue.
In her defense though the bright yellow clip did match nicely with the bright yellow cloud shapes on her dress. A dress which I can only liken to an explosion in a crayon factory. Damn me for not having a camera phone.

I know, I know I'm horrible. I'm going right straight to hell. I'm not passing GO, I'm not collecting $200 . I'm just going.

But I'll be damned if I'm not taking all yellow claw hair clips with me.

And so as not to make me feel like the overly hormonal,snarky be-atch that I've portrayed in this post it's your turn...what clothing item or accessory gives you the absolute heebeejeebees ?

19 comments:

Groovy Mom said...

Great. Next thing ya know you're gonna have me throwing out all of my banana clips too. What's next? My stirrup pants?

ALM said...

Pleated acid washed jeans. 'Nuff said.

Ann(ie) said...

I was in an elevator the other day with a girl who had a scrunchie in her hair AND as if that wasn't enough one on her wrist, too. okay now c'mon!!??? It was double offense. I didn't smack her b/c I would have had to find a place to set down my Starbucks.

Maureen said...

And that is why, as a blogger you MUST carry a camera with you AT ALL TIMES!

Oh, you children of the 80's you. I was a teen in the 70's so, basically EVERYTHING was a crime against humanity. Especially polyester and huge lapels.

CDP said...

I am 100% with you on the clips, which make more frequent appearances than they should in these parts.

Worker Mommy said...

"I didn't smack her b/c I would have had to find a place to set down my Starbucks."

Ah, Annie...that is why I love you!

Mommy said...

OMG! Alm took my thing! Make her give back the acid wash!!! hee hee

Really any light washed jeans at all must be done away with! I am not talking WHITE jeans, just any jeans that are sold in a faded blue denim color. YUCK

Thank HEAVENS the step-daughter is tiring of them - imagine having to see them EVERY DARN DAY and with raggedy hems no less.

She has begun the upgrade to the finer dark washes than you!

My other thing is white tennis shoes to work. YOU IDIOTS they do come in other colors that will look much better with your black nylons you insist on wearing.

Was that bee-yotchy?

Virtualsprite said...

Mullets and spiral perms. Oh, and mall bangs. If it takes you more than one can of hairspray to do just your bangs in the mornings, you have problems, my friend.

Daisy said...

Black socks with shorts, on men. We're still working on hiding all of my FIL's black socks so he cna't offend again. (Not really, but we're tempted.)

Lollie said...

I need clarification here, because I may be in danger of a major offense.
Does the clip have to be "clawed" to be bad? 'Cause I am currently wearing a "molded," black laquer, slightly rounded clip (okay, so it's on the top of my head holding a terrifically bad top knot, but there you go).

MichaƩle said...

My mom still wears the pleated jeans that cinch really tight at the waist and kind of balloon around the hips and are tapered at the ankles...yes, just like the "Saturday Night Live" "Mom Jeans" skit....love ya, Mom!!!!

Biddy said...

tapered leg jeans.

and spandex.

someone PLEASE ban the spandex and speedos. PLEASE

donnascand said...

Fanny packs are the worst invention ever!

Worker Mommy said...

Lollie, yours sounds tasteful. So you're excused...but if I ever see you with one of those colorful claw clips we're gonna have to talk

Not Afraid to Use It said...

Shit. I need to go and clean out my bathroom drawer immediately.

And I have seen all the snarky comments about scrunchies before, but seriously? How am I supposed to hold my hair back with two toddlers? Somebody give me a cooler alternative!

Queen of the Mayhem said...

Stone washed jeans.....yeah..I KNOW alm already said it...but whatever...I hate them too!

Big girls in low rise jeans! Low rise jeans are not for people with belly fat and staring at your muffin top is painfully reminding me of mine...JUST STOP IT!

Anything spandex....did I mention my muffin top? EWWWWWWW!

Heather said...

Bad news for you acid washed haters out there-- I was just in a very trendy upscale boutique in Las Vegas this weekend and lo & behold, there was acid washed demin staring back at me from the racks. It's back & it's not going to be pretty.

Whiskeymarie said...

*Mom jeans
*White leggings/tights
*MOST pleated pants
*slippers as shoes
*claw clips in public (I keep one for when I'm washing my face- it has never, ever seen the light of day)
*(I'm gonna take flak for this one) cheap, clearly knockoff purses. Just buy a decent, no-name purse, please.

Whew, that felt good.

Elisa said...

Yikes, claw clips. I have a whole list of clothing items that should be avoided at all costs, they are all from the 80s. I tell you, a horrible decade for fashion.

I even posted about on my blog: http://unlikelyhousewife.blogspot.com/2008/06/80s-are-back-run.html

So I hear you, sister.