Wednesday, July 30, 2008

I ask ye, Why oh Why wasn't I born rich ?

Something in me tells me that I was supposed to be born in to wealth. That or I was supposed to marry in to it. Maybe I was even supposed to invent the ped egg or the larger then life remote control and make millions. I just know it was supposed to happen for me.

How do I know ?

Because I could seriously work that lifestyle.

I'm not a stellar housekeeper. Never have been. That must mean I need a maid. I don't have one now but if I was rich I would. I'm sure I'd probably just call her "maid" (a la Karen from Will & Grace) because I'm that rich that I don't need to know servants names.

I can shop like a beast. Sure now, it's to Tar-zhay, TJ Maxx and Ross Dress for Less but I'm quite confident I can very smoothly transition to Barney's and Saks.

My feet, you know the ones that hate me, I'm positive would cease any and all rebellion when slipped in some Manolo Blanics.

Oh and work. Need you even question me there ? I would have no problem whatsoever not working. I'm very good at it now. Very good.

So you can see that it's meant to be for me.

Any millionaires out there want to adopt a 35 year old? I'm kinda short. I could probably pass for your kid, that is if someone was about 100 feet away and squinted really,really hard on a day when the sun was blinding them. It could be semi- believable. Think about it. I'm toilet trained, I can dress myself. I don't talk back. It could be good

Ok then, why don't you think about it and get back to me. I'll wait.

5 comments:

Queen of the Mayhem said...

I will adopt you....work up the papers. Wait....I just remembered......I'm not rich! DAMN! :)

Biddy said...

dude! i totally feel you girl! do you ever watch The Girls Next Door? i TOTALLY want to be Hef's girlfriend!

stupid champagne taste on a beer budget!!

Shana said...

Ahh, who has not had the Lil' Orphan Annie dream? I could certainly go for a Daddy Warbucks.

Not Afraid to Use It said...

If you get adopted, will you take me shopping? We left Tahoe to get away from the Karen's of the world, and somehow still ended up smack dab in the middle of a new set. Blech.

Butrfly Garden said...

Wouldn't it be wonderful to be just disgustingly rich? I would have to be THAT rich to ever really live like that, though. If I just made really good money, I'd probably still be a tight-ass with money and a control freak around my house.