Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Seattle, we might have to break up.

Dear Seattle,

I do not have time for this identity crisis you are going through. You are not the Artic. So please quit acting like it. Frankly, the fact that you have subjected your inhabitants to below freezing temperatures and crazy ridiculous wind chill factors for the past several days makes me want to kick you in the balls, or spit in your eye.

Seriously. Enough already.

What's more,the fact that you're showing no signs of trying to change and have decided my neighborhood looks pretty disguised as an ice skating rink doesn't sit well with me. Particularly since I am a procrastinator and have yet to have the kids pictures taken with Santa and have yet to finish my Christmas shopping. When you do these kinds of things, I can't do what I need to do and that makes me dislike you immensely.

So for the sake of preserving our 12+ year relationship, stop the madness.



CDP said...

I wrote a similar letter to Washington DC last spring when we had like 14 days of rain in a row. Specifically, I suggested that Washington DC learn to distinguish itself from Seattle.

Joy and Phil said...

We sold out in WA and moved into a home on wheels (RV) in 2004 then headed SOUTH. That has worked out pretty well for us until this year. Cool and wet here in Yuma, AZ the past few days. Not what we expect in the desert. Yuk!
The natives (I lived there for 67 years) will often tell you that WA needs all that rain to be so beautiful and green in the summer. Let's see now, there was about a week of summer (we were there June, July and Aug. to see the family) this year, right? I say ... There is nothing prettier than WA when the sun shines ... good luck!
Stay safe on those icy roads!

mo.stoneskin said...

Hey, I have yet to start my Christmas shopping, let alone finish it!

Lori Thompson said...

I live in the Seattle area too and this whole snow day thing was cute initially, now it's just annoying. Even my twins are tired of sledding.

Jennifer, Playgroups Are No Place For Children said...

If your letter works, let me know so that I can write a letter to my city.

Virtualsprite said...

Wow... that sounds a lot like Wisconsin right now. Only we have also been averaging -5 degrees as a high temperature. We got up to 20 degrees today. Party!

Yeah... I'm so not ready for Christmas, either.

MichaƩle said...

*sigh* Spokane is having the same problem, only ours involves two feet of snow in my front yard. I posted a picture of my house on my blog to verify the insanity.

Alex Elliot said...

Hmmm....I think I need to write a similar letter to the state of MA. I have not bought any presents for my husband because first of all I procrastinated (but let's not focus on that!) and second this weather out here is just so terrible!