Monday, April 20, 2009

Reading this might help save my marriage

I almost shanked my husband last night.

It was during a discussion, no let just call it what it was: an argument
about removing the safety guard rail that protects my son from falling from his top bunk.

You've probably already guessed that I'm opposed. At least at this particular time.

Yes my son is almost 6, but all it would take is one unconscious roll during slumber and bam he falls to the floor lands on his arm breaking it in two places or worse yet he lands on one of the wooden drawers underneath the bottom bunk that he and his sister always forget to close and cracks his noggin.

You see what I'm getting at here ?

Well the hubby did not. His stance was that my son wants to be a big boy and I'm not allowing him the chance to do that.

Ahem, so I'll spare you most of the gory details.

But what you do need to know is that as the argument labored on it got all kinds of ugly.

Me: I get that B would like to have it removed so he can feel like a big boy. He's a smart kid though. If I explain that I think he is a very big boy- it's just about keeping him safe he'll understand.

Hubby: Why don't you just put him in a bubble.

Me: Ok now you're just being stupid

Hubby: Even if he does fall he won't hurt himself

Me: You don't know that

Him: Ok get me some statistics on injuries from your computer

Me: I don't need to get you statistics. It's my son. There is nothing wrong with wanting to protect him. In fact it's my job.

Him: I'm taking it off on his birthday

Me: I'll put it back on

Him: You're gonna raise him to be a p_ssy.

Me: What the fuck did you just say to me ?

So how did all this end? It really didn't. Sure there were apologies at harsh words spoken but in the end neither of us were budging.

So I turn to you, dear internetz, for your thoughts. Am I being ridiculous? Is the hubby right ?

It's ok be honest. I promise not to shank you for doing so.

Uh... unless you disagree with me.


Sornie said...

Now that I have my shank-proof armor on I have to say that the rail has to come off at some point. I've fallen from a few feet and beyond some bruises I was alright. I fell down the basement stairs when I was four and even after landing on the concrete I was fine. Six years old seems like a decent time to at least try it and see if the boy is comfortable with it.

Cid said...

Leave it, they are meant to be left on. My son is 9 and it isn't even an option to ever take it off. I have known 3 or 4 kids who have broken arms from falling off the top bunk. It isn't worth it unless your husband is the one who wants to wait hours in the ER and then bathe and feed a kid in an itchy cast and tell him he can't swim or play sports for 6 weeks or so. Don't give in. There is no reason to take the rail off - ever.

Lunch Buckets said...

I agree with Cid - the rails aren't supposed to come off. My kid is 17 and I don't think it's ever even occurred to him that it's an option to remove the rail from his loft bed. Because it isn't. An option I mean. Besides, it holds the pillows up so I can't see what he's doing up there :)

Dumblond said...

Is this a rail that didn't come with the bed? Because all top bunks have to have that rail there...It's only meant to come off if you have one of those bunk bed sets that can be converted into two separate twin beds.
My son is ten and he still sleeps on the top bunk and the rail is just part of the bed. So there has never been that issue...
I suggest that if your husband really wants to encourage your son's need for independence and "feel like a big boy", get a new bed. One that is not a bunk.
Then all would be peaceful. Bubbles will fall from the heavens...and you and the husband can find something else to argue about. :)

WM said...

These are old school wooden bunk beds that don't have a built in safety guard so we purchased one that looks like

Ann(ie) said...

Stay stong, Ma!!! I'm with you all the way. Oh and Matt and I would most likely have the very same argument.

CDP said...

I'm with kids fall out of their beds (not bunk beds) all the time while they're sleeping. The 7 year old is more likely than the 4 year old to fall, in fact, because he's a more active sleeper.

MichaƩle said...

My 13-year-old has bunk beds with this built-in rail. We pretend its just a decorative feature of the bed! What's the harm in letting it stay on? What next, letting him ride in the car w/o a seat belt or car seat so he can be a "big boy?" Sorry, I'm with you on this. Sending your kid to school in full body armour is one thing but a bed rail is completely different. Ask your pediatrician what he thinks. Bet he would tell you to keep it on.

Debbie said...

We left ours up until our kids were 7. I'm so glad you won't be coming after me!

ML said...

Leave it on!! It only takes once...Why stress? Ask Dad how guilty he'd feel if by some remote chance something happened. And if he's willing to live with it forever.

Melain said...

Ok, first of all? I LOVE that you edited the word p*ssy, but not the word fuck.


And secondly, I'm with you. Having a railing on his bed is only going to make him feel like a baby if his dad TELLS him that having it there makes him a baby. At six years old, if you don't point it out, it's just his bed! He doesn't care yet!

I don't understand why The Man is even making an issue of this. The kid will grow up to be a puss if you don't let him ride a bicycle, play dodgeball or wrestle with his friends. The stupid bunk rail has nothing to do with his pending manhood. That's just retarded.

Life As I Know It said...

Leave it, leave it, leave it. I don't they are supposed to come off the top bunk. My son is 7 and has never questioned the rail being there.
Good luck!

Mama G said...

Wait a minute ... are you married to my husband too?? :-)

Leave it

David said...

While going through this i found out that it would help me because i also got the same problem and I am sick of it.

shanje said...

The kid will grow up to be a puss if you don't let him ride a bicycle, play dodgeball or wrestle with his friends. The stupid bunk rail has nothing to do with his pending manhood. That's just retarded.
save my marriage