Friday, August 21, 2009

Sometimes it's great to let others do your work for you

First off, forgive me readers for I have sinned.

My apologies to y'all for making commenting ridiculously hard over the last month or so. I thought I was doing a good thing trying to enable Comment luv for Blogger. I suppose that's what I get for thinking. The comment plugin required to enable it was basically a bastard of a plug-in and only served to make things harder for you and for me. So I've said my hail marys and deleted that sucker. Am I forgiven?

Secondly...busy doesn't even begin to explain my life at this moment. I have but two words. System conversion (at work) and ok that's technically 4 but anyway 'nuff said. Talking about it too much makes me feel all kinds of stabby w/a side order of head exploding.

Thirdly...because I can't function well enough to put together a post about the fun parts of my life. You know the stuff I like writing about. I give you this:

And for those of you that are all: You expect me to read all that ??? I will give you the abbreviated version of this long ass email I just received. It's about a new Iphone app called KegelTopia. Yup , it's an Iphone app for Kegel exercises. I'm still not entirely sure it's not a joke.

Now then, enjoy , have fun, and I'll holler atcha again when I can....


Hi –
Hope you’re doing well. I just wanted to flag a new iPhone application for you. Today, iTactility announced the launch of the KegelTopia application for iPhone and iPod touch. The full press release is below, but in short, the new app lets users select Kegel workouts to practice and allows them to track their progress over time.
Please let me know if you would like to review a copy of this app or speak to someone about it. Additionally, a short video demo is available at
(c) 202-xxx-xxxx

August 21, 2009 at 10:30am PDT

KegelTopia Launched in iPhone App Store
New exercise application helps new mothers get back in shape

August 21, 2009 – San Francisco, CA – iTactility, has today launched a new application, KegelTopia, through the iPhone App Store. This new interactive application is intended primarily for expectant and new mothers as a way to strengthen muscles prior to and after childbirth. The application provides a variety of exercise types, however, that should appeal to a broader audience of women hoping to strengthen a core set of muscle groups.
Kegel exercises have long been acknowledged as an effective way to rebuild pelvic floor muscles. The KegelTopia application offers a series of exercises narrated by a yoga instructor at various time intervals, making the exercises simple to do whether at home or elsewhere. Also developed to track your progress over time in terms of time intervals, the application makes tracking regular Kegel exercises easy and motivating.
KegelTopia features:
· Tutorial with audio content
· Audio exercise instructions delivered by a professional yoga instructor
· 3 types of pelvic floor exercises to address different aspects of muscle conditioning (Mini, 3 Second Hold and Elevator intervals)
· Interactive “Freestyle” exercise with contraction tracker records progress
· Preset timer for exercises
· Comprehensive history view to quickly assess overall progress (over various date ranges)

The KegelTopia application was inspired by a new mother after speaking with her doctor about exercises critical to improving her physical health after pregnancy. Developed in conjunction with a professional yoga instructor, KegelTopia is the most comprehensive Kegel exercise application for the iPhone and iPod touch. Available now at the iPhone App Store for US$4.99.

Media Contact
Oona Rokyta
Twitter - @o****ta

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

It rhymes with funyuns and is only slightly less classy

The universe is out to get me. Really. I think I was way to all about me back in the day, when I had every fantastic, orgasmic but feet destroying shoe one could ever dream of or want.

Now I'm in my mid thirties late feet.aren'

There was this betrayal and now...I may have a . I don't know if I can even bring myself to say it.

A bunion.

I know , I know...I'm as horrified as you are. Especially when I Googled my latest foot pain and this little bit of loveliness is what the internetz retrieved

For the record, that is NOT my foot. I'll go under the knife and be partially immobile for the better part of 6 weeks before I ever let my feet get to some gnarly looking hot mess like that.
I likey de sandals way too much.

So I see the doctor tomorrow for diagnosis and next steps...but I'd like to say to the universe once again, fuckyouverymuch. You're not even remotely funny anymore

Oh the agony of de feet. we don't end on a nasty, she wrote a whole post about feet again note I give you this much more delightful pic. And yes, that is my son, rocking a mohawk. He's in to the whole "rockstar" thing...and who am I to discourage the boys dreams.

Monday, August 10, 2009

The next time I complain about my kids...stick this in my face

Returning home Saturday night after celebrating the hubby's birthday I walked in to ... a spotless house.

My stepdaughter, GT helped the twins clean their room and figure out which toys they wanted to donate and had them bagged and ready to go, she got down on her hands and knees scrubbed the kitchen floor and according to her the twins suggested steam cleaning the carpet in the family room and so they did.

And as if that wasn't enough they made up our bed and left candy in the shape of a heart on it.

I'm now starting a full on campaign for GT to come live with us full time because seriously I could really get use to this children-doing-lots-of-work-so-I don't-have-to-sparkly-house-thing.

Then this morning, a morning I was sure was going to be hellish because I had to get the kids up and ready at o'dark thirty, began with my son protecting me from the law. "Mom," he said "watch out because there's a police car over there ...d'ya see it" I could've kissed his face off at that moment...because protecting his speed demon mom, well that's nothing short of awesome.
Later on during the drive we spotted another police car and I remarked that we sure were seeing a lot of cop cars for that early in the morning to which my son said "They must be looking for donuts"

LOVE that kid.

The end.

Monday, August 3, 2009

If you haven't guessed yet, I'm kinda avoiding the blogosphere and Twitter and every other social media site where people might talk about BlogHer

I could lie and say I haven't had time for the internetz because I've been really busy. But that would only be half true. Sure I'm busy. Why just last week my boss left town for two weeks - which means I'm doing her work and mine, my sister arrived in town which means I'm spending as much time as possible chillaxin with her, I had a wedding to go to and a party to host at my house. So there were things. Lots of things.

But my work requires that I sit in front of a computer the bulk of the day. So...that...would only be an excuse.

Look, if we're being honest here I'm kind of hiding. Except for reading a few posts and maybe commenting here and there I am for all intents and purposes pretending like the blogosphere doesn't exist.


In a word BlogHer. Which shall heretofor be renamed The-conference-that-no-matter-how-intently-I-set-my-mind-to-go-to-I-for-some-reason-or-another-can-never-make-when-the-time-comes.

I just can't bear to read all the wrap-up posts about how such and such party was so fab and how xyz panel was so positively life changing. I really want to cover my eyes and run away screaming from the computer screen when I read stuff like "I met Jane Doe blogger that I've read for years and she was as ridiculously awesome in person as I knew she'd be"

Oh and then there are the pictures. The pictures that clearly illustrate all the fun and fabulousness that I was not able to partake in.

So what am I doing about all that ?

I'm gonna pout. I'm going to fold my arms, poke out my bottom lip and pout. And hide and pretend like all of it didn't happen.

It's good to be mature.